I`ll make you hurt like I do, and I`ll never think twice.

NEWNEWNEW

Sun, 03 Apr 2005 08:58:38 GMT

NEW livejournal, add it bitch.

babys_got_a_gun

Sat, 02 Apr 2005 09:51:16 GMT

I can not communicate with you anymore.
With anyone for that matter.

You are numb, how can you not notice that?

I wish things never changed. I wish people could just stay the same.
Instead they just become more distanced. Why does it always happen to me?

Wed, 30 Mar 2005 21:40:27 GMT

Emotional wreck.

Sun, 27 Mar 2005 23:28:08 GMT

Today, I did a foolish thing. I found out a few things that should have been told to my face other than on the net to people who hardly know me.

I feel as my best friend betrayed me.
When I read what I read I felt as little needles were stabbing me from the inside, I wanted to get away so hard, to stay in denial. I really wish I could understand my mistakes, and understand why am i not a good human but as I type these words the needles are coming back coming out as tears. I'm a poetic fuck. Maybe that is why she dislikes me.
I should really talk to her about some of the things she said but I don't want to wreck anything.
Too late.
It seems as if the only thing i got left is to act as nothing happened. it will be easier to keep everything as normal.

It's only 4pm and i'm already feeling as shit, I don't know how the rest of the day going to go, I guess I should be sleeping it away.

PS- Thank you Robert for giving me a shoulder to lean on.

YO

Fri, 25 Mar 2005 08:16:17 GMT

It took my 5 hours to get the black out, NUTS.

As a rock n roll star...

Mon, 21 Mar 2005 04:50:36 GMT

Devendra Banhart has no right to do a cover to a Johnny Thunders songs. He completely wrecked it. Dumb ass.

I've been okay.. I really have been.
On friday, I hung out with my dad.
Went to the show... It was interesting from what I remember. I was drunk and stupid.
I puked some pretty attractive stuff.
I bet everyone liked it.

On saturday we went to the Roasterie.. We staid there for 4 hours and I had some of the best time i experienced in a while. It was amazing, me Lisa and the emo boy had a nice conversations... The one that leaves you with good mood and understanding.

Sundays blow.

I should finish my homework.
Good night.

Thu, 17 Mar 2005 07:22:27 GMT

I hate being awake.
I hate thinking too much.
I hate boys.
I hate boys who like pretty girls.
I hate not being a pretty girl.
I hate wishing to be a pretty girl.
I hate pretty girls.

I will rule.
I fuckin will.

Man o man

Wed, 16 Mar 2005 23:56:54 GMT

Thirteen random things you like:
01) Music
02) Vanilla
03) Intertetetettet
04) Nicotine
05) Whiskey
06) lisa&Jynelle
07) Slurpies
08) Playing jingle bells on my guitar
09) My dogs
10) Pretending i'm a rock star
11) Sleeping
12) Socks
13) Sun

Twelve movies:
01) Alice in wonderland.
02) Pulp Fiction
03) Kill Bill
04) Jackie Brown
05) Four rooms
06) God said ha
07) Night at the Roxbury
08) Natural born killers
09) Gia
10) Drunk punch love
11) The virgin suicides
12) Cry- baby

Eleven Good Friends
Shit son, 11? I got two. Lisa&Jynelle.

Ten things about me ... physically:
01) Green eyes.
02) My bangs change colours often.
03) Light eyebrows.
04) Tall.
05) Vertical labret.
06) Navel peirced.
07) Ears streched to 4-2ga.
08) Light skin.
09) Lips dry easily.
10) Weird shaped nose.

Nine random words:
01) Dance
02) Pink
03) Snow
04) Hair
05) LOLZ
06) Itchy
07) Romance
08) Sick
09) Die

Eight favourite foods/drinks:
01) Whiskey
02) Iced tea
03) Letuce
04) Chips
05) Pizza
06) Subway
07) Hot chocolate
08) Veggie buritto

Seven things in your daily routine:
01) Sleep
02) Brush my teeth
03) Pet my dog
04) Computer
05) Music
06) Look at my guiter and think why am i not a rock star
07) Paint

Six things that annoy you:
01) Snow
02) Corn
03) Most people
04) My mom
05) Girls
06) Bjork

Five things you touch everyday:
01) Cigarettes
02) Key board
03) My hair
04) My face
05) My dogs

Four shows you watch:
01) Dr.Phil
02) Oprah
03) Trailer park boys
04) Gilmore girls

Three People you have a crush on:
01) Stiv bators
02) The guy from the heartattacks LOLZZZZZZZZZ
03) Scene boys with nice smiles.

Two things you Hate:
01) School
02) My mom

One thing you love:
01) MUSIC&LISA&JYNELLE.

Oral.

Mon, 14 Mar 2005 03:57:23 GMT

So this weekend... This weekend has been pretty cool i must say.
On friday met up with Jynelle went and bought ciggs and was on our way to meet Becky. It's weird, because Jeff would say the dumbest things about her (only because she's his ex), which are obviously false sayings.
We continued our way to Value Village.
Later on to the roast, till she had to leave, and me and Jynelle went our way to Kyle's house. It was nuts. Sometimes you don't expect people to be nice, but those kids were extremely nice. Sitting, drinking with no worries felt good. Till we had to leave. Damn it why does he have to leave so far away.
The next day, it seems like everyone all of a sudden got a job and decided to take shifts on saturday. Stupid. Me and Jynelle ran into Ryder and Tyler and had a smoke and coffee with them.
I finished my whiskey at Kyle's and watched south park. That kid is cool. Too bad I don't see him that often.

Jynelle stole a cat from Kyle's community and brought him to his house. Kyle freaked out. Meanie.

Hmm Jynelle's sister got a new cam so i guess PICTCHUA TIME.

Dance to the music.

Fri, 11 Mar 2005 06:48:08 GMT

You like shitty people. I can't blame you though, you get lonely and annoyed by me pretty easy. As most do.

Suck ass weekend plans.
I hate plans though. Once I get my fake from Mike I will go to strip bars and rent me and Jynelle crazy cars.

Some people should die... No. Most people should die.

I love my Jynelley poo. Lets get married. With my european citizen we are going to move to England. I will have a fresh beginning. I will be a confused artist who will play in shitty clubs, you will be a make up artist as you always wished for. We will adopt babies, and sleep around. Come home, and tell each other how bad they were and how we wished for a true love.

Nah, not really. Love can suck my balls. I have lust in me waiting to be leased boy, and i am not scared to show you that.

I discover so many crazy stuff everyday. I know all of their secrets and they will never find out about it. I am not blind, and from what i have seen, you ain't that cool.

Never die old.

Wed, 09 Mar 2005 07:01:59 GMT

From the moment we are born, we are sucked into a huge machine. Endless devices designed to envelope and administrate all aspects of our life. It never spits us out. It has plans for the state of our living and fit accommodations for our death.

And we can't escape it. It holds all the options, fanatically. It has chewed up freedom and force feeds us it, half digested. We are not allowed to stay up through its night of thin meaning or peek into its dark bedroom of
delusion. It has made arrangements for every move we can make. Provides us with illness and remedy, cheap guidance at varying degrees of sadness and as many bland flavors as you like. And this empty affluence intoxicates us.

We are trapped in an equation in which we are forever a factor and never the sum - the answer. It's all calculated all indifferent math of sharp, harsh supply and soft, human demand.

Behold - The ceaseless workings of the dynamo of civilization. Its factories throwing up the fabric of our life like thick brown smoke. And the stars above creaking in their grooves in the sad machinery of night. Building
our houses, making our shoes, shaping our words, printing our books, pouring our coffee, tailoring our lives to the latest fashion, aesthetic and ethic and dumb.
Leaving nothing unanswered.
But the most basic need for immediate human truth.

Tue, 08 Mar 2005 08:08:18 GMT

I wrote this huge ass entry about emptiness, awkwardness, anti social, meeting new people, Elliott smith and spring break.

I hope LJ dies.

Now you can only guess what I wrote or try talking to me about what is going through my mind personally will help too.

Dear diary,
eat a booger.

Love, Iris.

Sun, 06 Mar 2005 19:28:42 GMT

So this weekend, was kind of a bore. Nothing excited.
I got my vertical labret pierced. I had to wait for my mom for 40 mins, till she got off work, in 17th ave. while i was witnessing a drug dealing in front of me.
After that I went to Lisa's.
We went to Shawnessy on friday. First we went to Wendy's. I ordered the "fresh" fruit bowl, such a rip off; the thing was haf fulled with lettuce. WTF. Sick.
The we got bored, so we were like "OMG TEEN NIGHT AT THE Y".
Blah.

Boring.

On saturday, Jynelle joined us and we went to sunnyside. We went to the roast and to Riley.

Yupp... I really think next weekend should be exciting to the max.

New Hair and piercing LOLZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ OMFGZ SO KEWL

Wed, 02 Mar 2005 06:11:24 GMT

The conversation i had with Lisa about me being a matriel girl, really effected me. I have been thinking about it for the past week, and i can not agree more with it. Pathetic.

I got into a fight with the only people who actually hung out with me at school. They are a bunch of whiny bitches, and i'm upset i have to see them every school day for seven hours.

My dad is coming back into town on friday. He better get me something.

I am still waiting for my shit to arrive.